What Does it All Mean? Finding and Pursuing Purpose

No matter one’s affiliation, leanings, beliefs, opinions, and all other persuasions, I think it can be agreed that life has been A LOT lately. This isn’t necessarily a good thing, a bad thing, promising or ominous; it just shows how messy, complicated, and downright overwhelming day-to-day living can be at times. When this is the case, it can be easy for someone to feel adrift, like they’re just going through the motions of life in a rudderless manner.

In our work as Coaches, we spend time talking about connecting with colleagues, and having meaningful conversations that promote reflection and deep thinking. Through this, breakthroughs and new ideas can emerge to impact one’s professional work and sometimes life. A couple of frames we talk about and use a lot are the DILTs model and the five  States of Mind…how they connect with and reflect our basic human needs and impact our thinking, our work, and our behaviors. 

With the DILTs model, the top level of the ‘pyramid’ is our Purpose…where our ‘mission’ and ‘vision’ for our lives, our work, etc. live. The thing is, all the lower levels of the pyramid should be fulfilled and established for the Purpose to be fully realized. Starting from the bottom, this includes Environment, Behavior, Skills, Values/Beliefs, and Identity…with each subordinate level leading to the next once it is established and healthy, i.e. the Environment in good standing leading to the desired Behavior. When a person’s Environment is not healthy and established, they may be feeling as though “life is happening to them” or their surroundings might be to blame…everything is from the outside in. When someone is in that state, it is much more difficult for them to have Behavior that is positive and feeds into maximizing the Skills - the next level up. 

As Coaches, we talk a lot about ‘coaching to the next level up.’ In other words, having those Cognitive Coaching reflective conversations that drive deep inward thinking and reflection, in an effort to move someone up the pyramid and also enhance the States of Mind mentioned earlier. 

These 5 States of Mind are Interdependence, Efficacy, Consciousness, Craftsmanship, and Flexibility. People in harmony feel and experience a high level of all these states of mind on a consistent basis - both in work and in life. High functioning teams develop, foster, and honor these dynamics. Productive and effective people work to reflect on these aspects and have a higher awareness of their impact on their work. 

And I think a lot of what’s been happening lately is that a lot of people are experiencing ripple effects of the last few years in diminishing levels: there’s been so much written and discussed over the last year around the decrease in our ‘collective interdependence,’ as Americans report being more isolated & lonely; more and more of us demonstrate Flexibility – in thought, feeling, belief, etc. which only leads to more isolation; if people feel like they’re less in control of their situation, they may experience lower level of Efficacy - the belief and confidence in the ability to make an impact and be capable, which coincides with Craftsmanship and overall skill within their life and work. And Consciousness…? Well, between echo chambers of social media, AI, and the constant confusion between what is the Signal and what is the Noise, there’s no telling just where one’s level of Consciousness might be, let alone our collective Consciousness. 

It can be easy to jump right to “hey - just find your WHY - your purpose.” There are lots of great videos, speeches, and articles around the power of WHY, and I completely agree. What our work reminds me, however, is that in order to fully realize our Purpose and pursue it with passion & energy, we need to work our way there, starting with acknowledging our current Environmental reality…work, home, life, etc. This is some of my favorite/most rewarding parts of the work → working with colleagues and having these Coaching Conversations to build toward this end.

Remember to take some time to reset, reflect on your environment, and move up the ‘ladder’ for yourself to realign Purpose. Check in with colleagues; be an active listener. For your students/employees, strive to create an environment where people can be ready to thrive. Be kind to yourself;  be kind to others; and once you find/remember that Purpose, pursue it on a daily basis. I mean, it beats the alternative, right?